- Know what role your divorce attorney will play. Divorce lawyers are there for a very specific set of tasks. You need your family law divorce lawyer to help you with your legal separation and al of the business of dissolving your joint assets, deal with any custody questions and make sure your legal rights are protected. Many people look to divorce lawyers to fulfill a host of needs that do not fall under their job description. You may need a counselor or life coach but that person is not your divorce attorney. They are not qualified for that and should not be expected to fill those roles for you.
- Talk to your friends and family. Divorce is common all over the world. In Mexico City, divorces are so common at the two year mark of a marriage that they were considering marriage licenses that only lasted two years. The chances are very good that you know people who have been through a divorce. Ask who their divorce lawyer was and then talk to them. Each divorce is unique so you may not hire the same person but this can get you started with a list of people to look into hiring.
- Talk to lawyers you know. The personal injury lawyer who helped with your cousin’s lawsuit cannot help you with your divorce but they may know of someone who can. Depending on where you live and how big the area is, the legal community may be one in which everyone knows everyone else. Even if that is not the case, that personal injury lawyer still may know a good divorce lawyer in your area.
- Make a list of the things you absolutely need and what you want. Knowing what you want and what you need out of your divorce is the first step to making sure you get it. No one really “wins” in a divorce. If you go into the process expecting to clobber your spouse, and you use this to color your judgement when talking to divorce lawyers, you will end up with an attorney who is a bulldog but who will not do you as much good as you think. You will make the process go on a longer time. Decide what you really need and want and remember that you will do yourself a lot of favors by being willing to compromise. This can help you pick a lawyer who can help you hold on to your sanity.
- Consider mediation. If you think that you can work with your spouse on all of the issues of your divorce, you may want to talk to divorce lawyers who are specialists in mediation. This can often be the quickest and cleanest ways to end a marriage. If you can avoid taking your divorce to court, you and your family will be much better off.
- Do not hire the first divorce lawyer you talk to. When you are looking at divorce lawyers, you should make it a point to talk to and get estimates from at least three family law firms. There are a few reasons for this. You will get a better idea of what your options are, you can find a lawyer with whom you connect and you can get different perspectives on your situation. This can be very important when you are dealing with any kind of divorce, complicated ones and simple ones.
Weddings are such hopeful and optimistic occasions. For this reason, many people feel like they have failed if their marriage ends in divorce. Your relationship may have failed but you did not. That may seem like a distinction without a difference but it is not.